Things that change when you have children....

Things that change when you have children:

1. You get up multiple times at night, and it is not for using the bathroom, throwing up from a night of too much fun, or getting a midnight snack... it is for a crying child that is hungry, sick (them throwing up), scared, OR just because they want to see if you will come up there. They might want their shoes, or a different pair of PJ's on, a passie, OR just to say I love you and to say their prayers again.
2. You start to look for shadows that MIGHT look like monsters in a child room to make sure they will not get scared at night.

3. Daddy turns into a horse.
4. Mommy does her exercise by running after her children... say goodbye to the gym!
5. Your house turns into a tornado zone! Really... it does!
6. Your couch turns into a fortress! A house made of pillows, blankets and crazy little children. Forget a place for the guest OR you as a matter of fact, to sit, it is now the children's HOUSE!
7. You will never, EVER be able to sit down for a full meal because either:
a. They want more drink.
b. They want more to eat.
c. They are ready to get down.
d. They are already down and fighting with each other.
e. They drop food on the floor that needs to be picked up or mopped up.
f. They fall OUT of their chair and hit their head on the table.

8. Their lotion turns into a pretend shampoo for their HAIR, (see picture below), rug, and carpet.

9. When they decide that they made a mistake for using the lotion for their shampoo, they will use the wipes that are suppose to be for their hinney, in their hair. And when I say using wipes, they WILL use all the wipes in the box.
10. You hear the English language used in many different context.
11. You hold hands with with little boys instead of your husband.
12. You NEVER get a day to sleep in... even if you sweet husband gets up with them, you still HEAR them.
13. You will never be able to write a blog with out getting up 50 times while writing it. (FACT)
14. You will NEVER take a shower in peace. Unless it is at 11:00 at night... and even then a child might be crying out for you.
15. When you do get a chance to take a SHOWER... you will have either have children pressing their face up against the glass, bringing every toy in the bathroom, (just something else to clean up), jumping in and out of the bathtub and possible face planting on your tile floor. You will have to get out to either split a fight between 2 siblings, put a crying baby's passie in her mouth, wipe someones butt, or to make sure that the kids don't get into something dangerous while you are trying to peacefully take a hot shower. Did I say peaceful????
16. The news will now turn into, "What did Swiper do today on Dora the Explorer?"
17. The TV is now officially, THEIRS.
18. DVR will be a blessing, but also a curse. When you turn on the regular TV, they don't understand why you can't skip the commericals.
19. Instead of talking with your husband about money, you are teaching your children NOT to put money in their mouth.
20. Chicken Nuggets have become the top of the food pyramid.
21. Your calendar will be tough to read your things to do, because their will be MARKS all over it from the kids "Wanting to Color" while you are out of the room.
22. When you want to get somewhere FAST, you had better start getting things and the kids ready 2 hours before. Now that is FAST in children world.
23. Say bye bye to the days of taking a shower, getting in your car to go to work stress free.... your day doesn't get stressful WHEN YOU go to work, it is WAY BEFORE you go to work!
24. When you have played a movie for the kids in the car once, you will never be able to listen to the radio again... they will say they want to watch "SHARK TALES" over and over, that you had rather listen to Shark Tales again then to them repeating themselves 1,000 times.
25. You will hear the words, "MOMMY, I GOT BOOGERS" so many times during the day that you don't even think it is funny anymore.
26. A trip to the grocery store WITHOUT the kids is considered a vacation.
27. You always pick a loud restaurant to go to with your kids, because who knows how loud their tantrums will be while you are there.
28. McDonald's to a kid is like a diamond to a woman!
29. You will never have a clean car again.... it will have french fries, crumbs, juice spills, throw up, spit up, hand prints, and mouth prints everywhere.
30. You will NOT have a dining room, living room, or a porch anymore. It has turned into TOY R US.
31. You surfing the net for stuff for you, will turn into surfing the net for trying to figure out how to be a better parent, if my child has ADHD, ordering groceries, signing your child up for some sport or just trying to order clothes for you new baby GIRL!!!!! Yep that is addicting!
32. Talking on the phone will NEVER be the same. Your kids WILL always find something to do bad while you are talking to someone, or will be yelling in the back ground where you can't even talk at all!
33. If you breastfeed, your body will ONLY belong to that baby... poor hubby!!!
34. Being clean= putting on lotion to cover up the stink, deo, and brushing your teeth if you have time!
35. AND LAST (there are many more changes, but I have to go break up a fight with my boys and get Maci up from her nap and feed her), YOU WILL NEVER LOVE SOMETHING MORE THEN YOU WILL LOVE YOUR CHILDREN!!! They are the most precious, yet aggravating, little people you will ever be around!!! JUST PURE LOVE!!! GOD'S BLESSINGS!